Sorry, Not Sorry :: Facing Insecurity
Do you have a hard time apologizing? Not me.
In fact, I apologize for everything whether I had anything to do with it or not. This is something my dear friends have pointed out to me on occasion...okay, all the time. (Thanks, Angeline and Danielle!) One day, I even sent a text to a friend on her way to my house, APOLOGIZING for it smelling like lemon BECAUSE I HAD BEEN CLEANING. What is this madness?!?
Knowing I apologize all.the.time, I am faced with the question, do my apologies sound ingenuous because the words, “I’m sorry,” roll off my tongue so frequently? I would never want that to be the case. Reflecting on this also begs the question, why do I feel the need to apologize for every little thing?
I am not the keeper of emotions. I am not the doer of all things.
I am not in charge of or responsible for the happiness of others. I can contribute to it, but I am not in charge of it.
So why do I feel the need to apologize for anything and everything that might cause discomfort or displeasure in the lives of others?
My response? Insecurity.
Insecurity takes root in our spirits and minds, and its expression can be in many forms:
Frequent apologies
Anxiety
Depression
Perfectionism
Becoming a people pleaser
Making comparisons between oneself and others
Withdrawing from or avoiding social interaction
Presenting oneself with overconfidence, even to the point of seeming arrogant or outspoken
Being insecure even makes it difficult to receive and believe a compliment.
I check many of those boxes—from anxiety to people-pleasing.
So how does one move past it? From insecurity to confidence?
I firmly believe healing and freedom from insecurity come in turning to God, believing His Word, and trusting who He says I am.
Several years ago, I went through the Believing God Bible study by Beth Moore. I still have the “Five Statement Pledge of Faith” on it that we repeated together every time we met.
“1. God is who He says He is.
2. God can do what He says He can do.
3. I am who God says I am.
4. I can do all things through Christ.
5. God’s Word is alive and active in me.
I’m believing God.” (from Believing God by Beth Moore)
Read that again. This time, say it out loud.
Did you hear that? I AM WHO GOD SAYS I AM.
Knowing and believing this truth is the path to freedom from insecurity.
So, who does He say you are? This is where it gets good! As one who struggles with insecurity to the point of seeing a counselor regularly, this list brings me to tears and gives me hope all at the same time.
God says you are…
…a child of God (John 1:12; 1 John 3:1)
…beautiful and wonderfully made in God’s image (Genesis 1:27; Psalm 139:14)
…God’s workmanship (Ephesians 2:10)
…a new creation (2 Corinthians 5:17)
…a temple (1 Corinthians 3:16)
…chosen (John 15:16; 2 Thessalonians 2:13)
…a friend of God (John 15:15)
…valuable and known (Matthew 10:31; Luke 12:7)
…accepted (Romans 15:7)
…justified by faith (Romans 5:1)
…redeemed (Isaiah 43:1; Colossians 1:13-14; Ephesians 1:7)
…complete (Colossians 2:10)
…beloved (Romans 8:38-39)
…ENOUGH. (1 Peter 2:9; Philippians 1:6)
Stop listening to the lies Satan whispers in your ear about your lack of worth or your inability to measure up. God says YOU ARE CHOSEN, REDEEMED, COMPLETE, ENOUGH! I will take God at His Word over Satan’s word any day of the week.
Believe this. Receive this.
You are a child of God, a daughter of the King, beautifully and wonderfully made in His image, justified by faith, redeemed by His grace, wanted, cherished, pursued, and LOVED.
I challenge you to take time today to list the things you believe about yourself, then compare that with who GOD says you are. Where do the lists overlap? Where are your beliefs off track? In those areas, find a verse that reminds you of God’s truth, write it down and commit it to memory. Write it on a card and put it on the dash of your car, use a dry-erase marker to write it on your bathroom mirror, use bath crayons to write it on the wall in the shower so you see it every day (sounds crazy, but I’ve done it!)…put it anywhere and everywhere until you’ve committed it to memory.
And next time those lies creep into your mind and lead you to that insecure space, claim the truth of who GOD says you are.
“I am who God says I am. I’m believing God.” ~Beth Moore (Say it with me!!)
Grateful for Grace and Truth,
Sarah
